I dunno where I'm going with this

I was born in Rocky Mount, North Carolina. I moved to Arlington, Texas when I was 8 and I haven’t left since. Arlington is now best known because it’s the home of the Dallas Cowboys Stadium. I’m not sure if it was known for anything before that. Oh wait, the Amber Alert was originated there.

Only recently have I “really come into myself.” What I mean by that is that I have finally come to my own conclusions about what I think about the world. I have some pretty strong beliefs for once that haven’t been indoctrinated to me by my parents or teachers and I’m proud of that. I should also add that I in no means have figured out who the hell I am yet. Still working on that. Hope to know soon.

Whereto?

A co-worker was laid off today. Kind of shocking because well, it was a shock. That makes me nervous because if someone has to go next, it's totally me. Krystle asked me if I want to end up getting a new job eventually or stay at the one I have. I seem to get asked that a lot.

I don't really know what to say. I mean, for now this job is okay. I have my own office, good hours, and a good friend working with me. It's just not what I majored in. I don't really know why the hell I majored in Marketing but it's a done deal. I know you're telepathically trying to tell me I can go back to school and "be whatever I want," but it's not that easy. It's usually the people who got all their school paid for telling me that, too, so I don't think they quite understand. Maybe I'll change my mind in a few years and regret not going back to school for Journalism or Archaeology, but as of right now I'm not going back. I don't want that burden. Mentally, physically, or monetarily. I may not love my job but I do love having the weekends off. I love having time to read a book or go on a random vacation. A lot of people who love their job can't tell me the last time they did something enjoyable that didn't involve work. Well, I can. It's give and take, I suppose.

To sum up my answer to Krystle: I said that I don't really know. Right now, it's okay but if I ever do want to change jobs, I want to change my entire location. I want to experience a new place. I just don't know how or where I'm going to accomplish this.

Extra! Extra!

I cannot stand celebrity news shows. I used to watch them because they were entertaining but I've since come to the conclusion that they are just straight-up creepy. I feel like celebrities must think the entire American population is obsessive over them when really, we aren't. These shows, magazines, blogs, etc. are just a minute form of entertainment. Access Hollywood gets high ratings because it comes on right before Glee. People Magazine has a zillion subscribers so that we can have pictures to look at while we wait for our dentist appointment. We're not really interested. It just passes the time between one event to the next.

I'm not saying that I wouldn't think it cool if I saw a famous person at the airport or something, but I wouldn't creep on them. The paparazzi give these bitches too much credit. It's sad they have to live their lives in seclusion because in reality, no one really cares about them (sans Michael Jackson, apparently). Hollywood has just created this bubble around them 'cause it's something to do. A distraction from their boring, monotonous lives.

Currently Reading

Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse.

"When someone is seeking...it happens quite easily that he only sees the thing that he is seeking; that he is unable to find anything, unable to absorb anything...because he is obsessed with his goal. Seeking means: to have a goal; but finding means: to be free, to be receptive, to have no goal."

I don't want to be that Debbie Downer

I don't tell anyone how I really feel about anything because:

1. I only really feel it while I'm inebriated.
2. I don't want to be that person who's always being pathetic about everything. Because eventually people stop listening and stop inviting you places because they don't want to deal with your negativity.

Tonight, I admitted that I feel like this blog is a sort of memoir of me.