What a difference a year makes

Ain't that the truth.  Unpleasant things happened this past year, that's definite.  I go back and forth between anger and gratuity, depending on my mood.  Which changes every 6 minutes, about.  

When something bad's happening to me, it feels so specific.  Like I'm being singled out and discriminated against.  But that's not true.  I mean, it can't be true, right? Other people are dealing with the same things or MUCH worse.  This book I was recently reading said something about how you may feel all alone when you're up at 3 in the morning pondering your life, but really, there's many other people doing the same thing.  And so you're not really alone at all.  Reading that put me at ease- for the moment.

When I unclothe myself of pride and contempt, I'm thankful for the past year.  I'm thankful for those that I've met and things that have happened.  They weren't pleasant then and for a long time I felt like nothing could get better, but it did.  There are things in my life that I want to change, of course, but I'm happy for the way things are going.  There are no asterisks or parenthesis by my feelings.  They just are.  I suppose I've been set free.

Reality

Vampires, werewolves, zombies, angels, witches, wizards, unicorns.

All are so prevalent in our society yet none are real.

Or are they?

No, that's stupid.  Or is it? 

What is real or not real?  I dunno and I guess I don't care that much.  

Well, zombies.  Maybe I care.

My dad's birthday is January 3rd.

Every year when he was younger, his mom would leave the Christmas lights up until after his birthday had passed.

Technically

Constellations are just stars connected by invisible lines.  Created by man a long time ago.   

Each of us could look up at the sky at night and see whatever we want to see.  We could connect the dots into any reality we want.  I think about that a lot.

Henri

I have shouted to God and the Virgin, but they have not shouted back and I'm not interested in the still small voice. Surely a god can meet passion with passion?
She says he can.
Then he should.
-The Passion, Jeanette Winterson

It's funny

how the way people are on Facebook is in no way how they are in real life.  Or in front of me.  That may be a better way to put it.  It's all glitter and smiles and good riddance on Facebook but in person you see the madness. Maybe it should be called SaveFacebook because it seems like everyone's just putting up these sunsetty fronts of who they wish they were.

This is How

This is how you survive the unsurvivable, this is how you lose that which you cannot bear to lose, this is how you reinvent yourself, overcome your abusers, fulfill your ambitions and meet the love of your life: by following what is true, no matter where it leads you.” 
- Augusten Burroughs